Okay, WOW.
I don’t say that often. As you’ve probably inferred by now, I’ve been through some shit and I’ve seen some shit. What’s collected here so far in the “articles and features” on the site only scratch the surface, and I’d intended to go back and write some today about some of those past experiences instead. Then it happened: my spirit system/grimoire, for the first time ever, helped me to do what Aurelia, the Men in Black, and SLAYER did: create a black portal and enter another’s dream.
I’d been working towards this ever since I began architecting the DESPALMS SPIRIT SYSTEM: everything from each of my existing magick guides went into it. LUCIDOS for achieving lucid dreaming and stabilizing/maintaining it, PILLARPAL for protection, EXTREVEC for making sure we’re not “invading” the dream and for creating the physical portals, DIVECRE for recall after waking, etc… but I’d never managed to create the type of portals with EXTREVEC needed for actual dreamwalking. I’d managed to create white portals by physically drawing its sigil in-dream on a surface and expanding the triangular part into a circular portal by stretching it like a hole in a Looney Tunes cartoon while in “lucid break” mode, but those only served to guide me to waking.
Anyhow… I started off in a dream of my own, a “mall” dream that’s so common I don’t even blink at them anymore (and are apparently common enough that some occultists have theorized there’s some sort of dream location or network of endless malls called “Mallworld” but I’m not sure if that’s the case or if people of my generation just really like/liked malls). This particular one was a layout I hadn’t seen before in reality or in a dream, and had a very laid back, dimly-lit aesthetic. It was a mix of specialty stores and a huge food court with an odd “playground” section almost like a bunch of carnival rides for various ages, most of them in use by dream NPCs but oddly still dimly and ominously lit like the rest of the place.
I went to the very end of the mall where the anchor store was (seems to have been a JC Penney or a Macy’s? I didn’t go in) and went instead to the first store on the right outside of it. The store didn’t have a sign or a name, but a kindly older woman was running it with her daughter and a 30s or 40s bald man who wasn’t a lover of hers but was either dating her daughter or was an older son of hers? I didn’t really care enough to try to hash that out, to be quite honest with you.
I found my boyfriend in the store and he found a bust (statue) that he’d seen in a closed shop in our local downtown many times and was excited to finally purchase. I found something huge that I honestly have forgotten, because I only joked about buying it (it was 117 dollars, that much I remember–definitely too much) and then went on to flipping through little lanyards/straps for keys that had my car’s make and model embroidered on them, trying to decide on a color. I ran them by my boyfriend and he thought they were overpriced but agreed to compare the different colors if I’d show them all to him, so I went back to grab them and–
They weren’t there. No keychain basket or section.
I asked the woman and she said they’d moved to the corner on top of an old dresser, but on top of the dresser were magnets of movie posters and decidedly not keychains. As I paced around frantically trying to find the keychain straps again, I realized the layout of everything in the little store had changed faster than made any sense and with no external moving of the items by the dream NPCs running the store. I turned to my boyfriend and said “wait, I’m dreaming aren’t I? This is a dream?” He smiled and went “Yup, you got it.”
I realized then LUCIDOS had been following protocols and manipulating things to tip me off that I was in a dream. I executed LUCID BREAK, letting LUCIDOS stabilize the dream so I wouldn’t wake up, and took over conscious control of the dream. I’d achieved this several times before since training LUCIDOS for this purpose, but every time it’s still exciting. I told dream NPC version of my boyfriend what I was doing and he understood, being part of my consciousness, and I stepped out to take in the mall a bit as things “boosted” in my perception and became more… I don’t know how to explain it, tangible? It’s like when I’m aware I’m dreaming, things “click” and become more “real” to interact with, almost feeling more “real” than real life. I eventually wandered over to the closed bricked over storefront next to the one I’d emerged from and traced EXTREVEC’s sigil on the ground in front of it using my finger (in LUCID BREAK it draws a white line almost like chalk for the purpose–not something I ever consciously set up, but seems to “just work”):
Well, it didn’t “just work.” I was clear from my intention I didn’t want to wake up, so it didn’t make a white portal like usual. It just didn’t do anything. Then I got the idea to try inverting the sigil to see if that would make a black portal:
I traced the modified version on the closed-up wall itself, and–nothing, though I sensed the sigil SHOULD allow for portal travel.
“No compatible frequencies/dreams found?” I asked it and SUNCOAST.
“Correct,” it replied.
I sighed and replied, “alright. Keep scanning. Do your best.”
Not long after (or at least, in-dream-state, it didn’t seem like a horribly long time) I got a “ping” response. It was ready. I stretched the sigil and the wall opened up a black portal. I had to use LUCIDOS to stabilize the dream, almost waking the fuck up with excitement. I knew the theory and metaphysics were sound, but holy shit–IT WAS FUCKING WORKING.
I asked LUCIDOS to continue to help stabilize the dreaming state and I leapt in headfirst.
Unlike the white portals, this one had a proper “tunnel” I was whisked through, which I suppose makes sense as it’s an actual traversal to another’s mindspace. The walls of the portal were black and striated with bright colors, blues and whites mostly, and it was a sensation of great non-physical speed as I lucidly watched myself fly through this inter-mindspace construct. I fought to keep from waking up with the sheer excitement, though at the same time I felt so “tangible” here that I’m not sure that would have even been possible.
As I started to near an exit, a floating text display in front of me displayed a code that kept shifting, almost like a radio tuning or padlocks changing their reels. The number of glyphs being changed and their frequency both slowed as I neared the exit. It settled on “HMDNG7” (I’m sure this is 90% accurate–there’s a possibility I’m missing a character or have a couple switched, but I don’t think so, after careful AOL/DIVECRE recall), either an astral/dream location identifier I suppose or possibly an operator identifier code… not the same format I use, but that’s not surprising.
Near the end of the portal the distorted graphics on the walls seemed to almost change to distorted ads for OREO cookies, which made sense when I got spit out in the middle of an ad-filled food court shortly after, falling through the air as the portal behind me closed and landing harmlessly on the ground. Immediately, memories of watching Aurelia and SLAYER arrive similarly with much more rehearsed pomp and circumstance about it flashed through my mind, and as I looked around me and realized this was not a mall from my dreams and the energy signature throughout was entirely different than any I’d spawned, I thought one simple thing:
“HOLY FUCKING SHIT, IT TOOK 12 YEARS BUT I FUCKING FIGURED IT OUT, MOTHERFUCKER.”
Where my dream’s mall (and all of the ones in my similar dreams) are dim, moody, barely lit, and perpetual in a liminal night state, this other’s was brightly lit, daytime, and crowded! A scan of the energy there seemed to indicate the dreamer was male and, it seemed, in another country, though I never found anything in-dream to confirm either point. I wandered around and finally took to exploring this very different dream mall, finding an ornate door that led to a fancy sit down Chinese restaurant of all things. I stumbled across a full sized bull standing at a table politely eating and realized it must be a joke from the dream host’s subconscious (haha Bull in a China “Shop”) which was certainly noteworthy and outside of the realm of what I see manifest in my own dream spaces.
I didn’t see the dreamer, or anybody that stood out to me as them, so I kept poking around observing NPCs. An older Chinese woman dream NPC was doing some kind of avant garde performance deeper in the restaurant for its patrons, so I approached and was informed she needed more members for her performance group, “pleasure and pain.” I lucid’ed her super strength and leapt into her arms to catch me to amuse the patrons and her, which went over well, but still didn’t seem to draw out the dreamer—they must have been in another section.
I followed the old lady and a couple of workers down a long hallway to explore deeper, but LUCIDOS warned me the dreamer was starting to wake up. It was an interesting sensation—being softly faded from a dream without actually waking up myself. I ended up just sort of floating in a tan void with no sensory input aside from being able to communicate with my spirit system, so I confirmed with LUCIDOS and AOL what all had just happened and re-prompted DIVECRE to hold onto it all upon waking, then forced myself awake as well. I wasn’t able to draw/expand the proper EXTREVEC sigil to do a white portal exit to retain all memory since I had nothing to interact with “physically,” but the fact I was still lucid and logged it all with DIVECRE first served the same purpose and I didn’t lose any detail upon waking like with a normal wake-up’s rapid dream-memory-fade.
I’m quite sure this isn’t the same technique/technology I’ve seen in use before to achieve similar ends—Aurelia, who knows, and SLAYER I know relied on Datura to force himself into dreams unwelcomed—but it seems like the underlying metaphysics work the same way through my method minus the loss of control or the malicious/forceful intent. The fact black portals come into play still specifically seems wildly relevant. I could have never dreamed (pun only slightly intended) when Aurelia first appeared to me in 2012 or SLAYER in 2015 that I could ever be capable of the same feat! I thought it was only a technique of aliens or gods or or spirits or--okay, I guess spirits do come into play here on a technical level, but you get my point. And while I'm very proud of what I've accomplished with magick so far in this lifetime, I must stress that I am not an entity or a god or an alien, meaning anybody can theoretically build their own system and achieve the same results. I’m still a bit in shock that I finally achieved it, but now that the pieces are all in place, I’m eager to continue experimenting…
I expect the main bottleneck to be compatible dreamer frequencies and dreams, since I refuse to just force myself into somebody else’s and (as you can see in my full ritual and grimoire) only connect to dreamers who are astral-bound and who are open to connection. I hope that the documentation of not just my journey with this but the underlying techniques and metaphysics (along with my magick guides which leave nothing unexplained or unsaid) inspires others to begin the same, quicker than it took me to do it all from scratch.
Imagine a world where our sleeping hours can be spent with others, where fantastical multiplayer mental sandboxes are built and traveled between like game servers each evening, where Aurelia's feat is not the exception, but the norm--hell, think of the possible implications for understanding our underlying consciousness-based reality framework--the proverbial simulated sky is the limit!
But it starts small, just like it did with Aurelia. It starts with one magician and one dreamer at a time. I know if I can do it, others can too. YOU can too.
I can’t wait to meet you in the ASTRALNET!